48. Fine tuning
Re-reading your work in progress is dangerous. Some writers I have met or interviewed claim never to re-read their work – until the very last minute. (One of them admitted to me that his publisher recognised the signs and pretended to be expecting the work to an early deadline, but actually programmed publication for three months further away.)
But however painful it feels to read what you've
written, it is very important to leave enough time for re-reading and
revisions.
Often it feels like your work is on the point of collapse. I'm not talking
about an exceptional, dull Monday morning or an
unprofitable, hung-over day of useless scribbling. Every time you pick
up your note book or open the files on your computer you are certain
of only one thing: it's awful, the idea you started with wasn't worth
the effort you've lavished on it and any future time spent on this empty
farrago of a story is …
Well, you get the picture.
The important thing is, you're wrong.
The initial idea is just as strong and interesting as it ever was. The effort you've put in has framed that idea in ways that gave you pleasure and will, undoubtedly, charm your readers … if you can just finish it!
There's a good description of what I'm talking about in a Laurie Anderson song:
You're walking
And you don't always realise it
But you're always falling.
With each step
You fall forwards slightly
And then catch yourself from falling.
Over and over
You're falling
And then catching yourself from falling.
And this is how
You can be walking and falling
At the same
Time.
That's a good description of how I feel when I'm revising – fine-tuning
– my work. I'm about to fall flat on my face but through perseverance,
determination and sheer force of will I keep myself
upright.
Leave time … enough time.
